After much research, at the age of 6.5, my cat Piper has invented the concept of sitting on laps. It has been an arduous journey and extremely counterintuitive to her beliefs, and yet, at long last, this innovative thinker of a feline has finally arrived at the inescapable conclusion — after years of study — that the best way to get scritches may in fact be by sitting on a human lap. A previously inconceivable thought.
She sat on Daniel’s lap for seven minutes. An astonishing breakthrough in this weird and vaguely immoral new technology.