by Mary E. Lowd
You needed space
But I needed a sign
Anything
Something I could hold onto
Saying you were worth my time
I sent you daffodil pictures
One every hour
Going on for days
Feeling like a stalker
Waiting for a reply
Anything to verify
You would be there for me too
After all the days I listened to you
Made you breakfast in the afternoon
One text back
One word
One picture
Of a daffodil
Or anything
But you let my hope die
Rather than budge even two letters
Even just “ok” as a reply
You sent me an email
Several years later
Full of big blocky paragraphs
That ran on for pages
Full of apologies and clever references
That delighted my playful, catlike brain
Confusingly intermixed with blame
And recriminations
I highlighted all the parts in green
Where you were sweet to me
And red wherever the words turned mean
It looked like Christmas when I was done
But felt like a cruel prank on Halloween
There was more red
Our relationship is still dead
I don’t know what it would take
To resurrect it
But I think about that letter
And the pictures
Of daffodils