The Night Janitor and Alien Oceans

by Mary E. Lowd

Originally published in Typewriter Emergencies, June 2018


“Rerin’s rounded ears flattened, and she looked out the window at those oceans again. Was there someone down there?”

Rerin jostled the control panel while rubbing it down with a rag.  The raccoon-like alien didn’t know how the day-crew got the bridge controls so sticky.  They were supposed to be searching the oceans on this world for signs of sentience — not snacking and boozing on Eridanii brandy.  Rerin had expected janitorial detail on a starship full of human and s’rellick scientists to be an easy job.  Instead, the naked-skinned primates partied all day, and the s’rellick shed scales everywhere — not to mention the extra work involved in tending to their live food.  Ugh.  Terrarium after terrarium filled with scuttling insects and rodents.  Rerin would not be signing on with this ship again. Continue reading “The Night Janitor and Alien Oceans”

Late Night Thoughts on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

Staying up past 3am playing Diablo and listening to Crazy Ex-Girlfriend is healthy…? Yes, yes, I’m sure it is.


The highest levels of coolness I’ve ever seen achieved:

— Jordan Peele in The Twilight Zone
— Rachel Bloom in Crazy Ex-Girlfriend’s “So Maternal” Continue reading “Late Night Thoughts on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend”